Marital Abuse: A major issue we don't talk about!

 One of every 3 women is a victim of marital abuse in our society. Even though we try to avoid this issue as much as possible by overshadowing it with certain unreasonable reasons, the rate of incidents occurring in our society because of marital abuse has risen to the point that nothing can overshadow it.

Abuse is not only when a woman is physically hurt but abuse is also when one person in a relationship tries to dominate and control the other one. It's specifically to gain control over the partner. They will use anything, be it fear, guilt, shame, or strength to push their partner down and to keep them under their fist of the hand.

It is very indiscriminate and occurs within all age groups. Often the abuse begins with threats and verbal assaults when then escalates to violence. It not only physically injures someone but also affects them emotionally and psychologically.

A healthy marriage is one where both individuals understand and respect each other. There is no place for abuse in such a relationship. But a relationship where you constantly feel like walking on a pile of thorns around your husband, always watching your words and what you speak to blow up the situation is one with all the potential signs of marital abuse.

It's very important for an individual to feel safe in a relationship. If your husband gets home and thrashes you, that is not loving. Constantly beating you up, abusing you, degrading your self-worth is not something to be quiet about!

In many marriages, women are forced to have sexual intercourse, and according to some, it's not rape. Let me remind you sex that does not have your consent is forced and forced sex even by your husband is a crime and considered to be “Rape”.

At any point in time if a woman feels she is not being treated the way she has to be then she has all the right in the world to raise her voice against it, demand justice, and walk off from the relationship.

There is nothing in the world that can change the personality of the people who cause these atrocities on their women. These individuals show very little potential for change and therefore second chances for them can be quite meaningless. If given it does not stop but gets even worse. For example:

In a recent incident at Rampur Uttar Pradesh, a man tied his wife’s hands and feet and sewed her genitals with an aluminum thread after he suspected her of having an extra-marital affair. He left her bleeding on the floor and fled. Well! This wasn't the first she was abused daily which also led to the death of the woman’s newborn soon after birth.

No one should have to endure this kind of pain, and your first step to breaking free is recognizing that your relationship is abusive, you need to get out of it and get help as soon as possible. 

Everyone despite their nature, age, color, race deserves to feel valued, respected, and safe. There is nothing, absolutely nothing that can take this from an individual.

Only you can help yourself because the first step here has to be yours!